The title sums up what life has been the past 5 months and a half (and yeah, I haven't updated my blog THAT long). Some people say life is a roller coaster. Well, I say, the past few months had been a roller coaster already for me.
After Tung Ling, I have braced myself for what's coming in the 'real' world. (Don't be scared, its not that bad) God has been faithful. To report here on what I've been doing the past months will take an hour (or more) just to read up [or maybe I'm just exaggerating :p] but I'll just highlight things that I've learned.
To be aligned with Him. Like a car without proper alignment, it will go to different direction even by a degree of error. We need to be aligned with His purpose and His will. Sometimes we might find it difficult to do so, but as we pray and ask the Lord to align us, He will graciously pull out His hands and help us to fix it. For me, personally, the word "alignment" was prophecied+prayed over me for three significant times that I remembered. By then, I know that God is speaking something really serious when He is saying it for 3 times!
Shift and shed. This is one of the things we've learned in one of our classes in WLI. When God told Joshua that he'll lead the Israelites as Moses was dead, He is telling Joshua to shift to the new things that God is about to do through Joshua and to shed the old wineskin. Nobody likes changes. At least I am one of those people, since temperamentally, I am a high S. I don't like changes, especially when I'm already comfortable with it. Yet God has a different plan for me. It wasn't easy. I struggled a lot. Like, a lotttt. In the way that I think, the way I see things, the way I act. Slowly, I felt that God is telling me to TRUST HIM because actually, the reason why people find it hard to shift is the lack of trust. There was a moment where this is a huge blow for me in the face when I realized the root of the struggle. The more I learn to trust Him (in a new way), the more I found it easier to live and move and SHED. I've to admit, the "shedding" part has got a lot to do with the way I think. To put it clearly in other words - to put off the old wineskin, old thinking.
True humility. Humility is a word that once meant to me something that is very kind, gentle at ALL time. True humility isn't found through the posture of how you stand or walk or talk or even act! It starts all from the heart. For instance, I have a friend that had more than once complimented me on my talents that I have been using to serve in ministry. My natural reaction was to say "No lah.. Its all glory to God bah.." My friend straightforwardly told me that that was a false humility. I was taken aback. That was the first time someone ever dare to say that to me. I couldn't accept it until some time when I ponder and ask God about it. This is what God revealed - See, it has nothing to do with the words that I have said. But the attitude of my heart wasn't right. Definitely the talents are gifts from God but nothing wrong to acknowledge the compliment. I realized this as well - the 'natural reaction' I gave to my friend has blinded me into believing that I was saying it out of humility when reality was that, my heart wasn't truly humbled when I've suppressed my feelings from acknowledging the compliment (I think you will know this, the feeling of refusing to say "thank you" when someone compliments you yet you feel proud of it deep inside). I thank God for revealing this to me. This is only a small example of false humility. God wants to teach His children the truth (His truth) that will truly set you free so always have a teachable heart!
I hope this entry will find its way to encourage and bless you in any way that it could.
Thanks for reading.
Nethy@Athena.
